The Problem with Ego

I reopened my Facebook yesterday. My blog had only been updated a few days and already I felt compelled to show it to the world.

What was I trying to show exactly? My growth?

Honestly, I feel like a fraud half the time. I don’t know how to be happy, much less the secret to inner peace.

Take my last post for example

https://farmerish.org/2022/12/02/manifestation/

(I also have no idea how to embed links in this site.)

Anyway, I wrote a post on manifestation: “Think happy thoughts” and positive affirmations.

But do you know what I really tell myself daily?

“I’m the worst.”

It’s usually the first thought that pops up after I’ve done something I perceive as wrong.

The thing is, I know I’m not the worst. Otherwise I wouldn’t have felt motivated to reopen my Facebook just to promote my blog.

But maybe what I really need is just validation from myself. So new affirmation:

You are not the worst. I am simply trying to do the best I can.

My ego, on the other hand, still has trouble processing that my best will never be perfect. And that’s ok, because hopefully being authentic matters more.